There Is Only God

“Yes, we love to go into this timeless background of consciousness and awareness absolutely. Very liberating, isn’t it? It’s very, very freeing; very profound and very beautiful. And yet, if taken in and of itself, all we’ve done is switched sides of an illusion. We’ve gone from form and time, to formlessness and timelessness, and we say: ‘Well, this state must be more true,’ because it’s more comfortable, basically. It just feels better.
But the truth is that it’s only when these two sides collapse together – that this world of form is the timeless – that what we call form is emptiness, it is consciousness, that’s what it is. Then, there’s no stance anymore, is there? There’s no more the sense that ‘I have to remain as awareness’. We only have to remain as awareness if we don’t really know that this wall is awareness, that your car is awareness, that this entire existence is awareness. Once we know that, then we are we finally freed, are we not? We are finally freed from the need for the ‘me’ to get into the right state, and stay there. Then, and only then, the duality of our experience finally collapses.” ~ Adyashanti

This ordinary, everyday experience that you(we) take so much for granted is the whole truth, the total perfection – right here, right now, always. There is no path that can bring you to the ‘final perfection’. You can, in fact, never leave it – except, of course, in your imagination. It has frequently been described as being ‘Awake’, which is in fact the exact meaning of the sanskrit word ‘buddha.’ [Being awake, just normally awake, is in fact all that is truly required. It has also been often referred to as ’the end of seeking,’ or ‘seeing what’s here’. However, our conditioning and our beliefs, our filters and projections, only permit us to see what we ‘think’ is here. That is problem one. Problem two is that we don’t know there’s a problem one. We assume the reality of our experience to be ‘Reality’; as in ‘Really Real.’]

Probably the most profound and generally inscrutable statement of the Buddha comes from the Prajna Paramita, or ‘Heart Sutra:’ “O Sariputra, form does not differ from emptiness and emptiness does not differ from form. Form is emptiness, and emptiness is form.”

This ‘enlightenment process’, if there is one, often called ’awakening’ or ‘the unobstructed clear seeing of reality’, is reflected in the famous Zen Buddhist maxim:  “First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.”  It points to the non-dual nature of all things.  It cannot be seen, felt, experienced or understood by the mind – that would, of course require an observer who was separate, and there isn’t one.  It is always and inevitably only ‘this’ – formless emptiness appearing as everything (including ‘us’, of course, and all of our stories of birth, death, separation, redemption, salvation and ‘re-union’ with the Absolute).  If ‘There Is Only God’, where could a separate one possibly be found to ‘return to Him’?  In the end, there is in fact, only Paradise – just ‘this’.               [Sorry if it may not seem quite like ‘you’ imagined!]

The Catch-22 in the spiritual quest, ‘the Search for Enlightenment’, always boils down to the same core stumbling-block, which is:  the ‘one’ who seeks it.  Even among those whose keen insight has led them to the understanding that ‘enlightenment is the realization of the absence of the one who wants it’, more often than not they/we continue to trudge relentlessly onward towards that lofty goal– the death of the ego.  The challenge, and the problem (for the ‘me’), is of course that ‘I’ can never be there to experience my own absence.  The solution, or perhaps ‘dissolution’ would be more accurate, occurs naturally hundreds of times a day, when a person (i.e. body-mind) becomes so immersed/absorbed in whatever activity of life they are involved in, that they lose any sense of the passage of time or of ‘self-conscious’ awareness.  They can’t remember how long that ‘self-less’ period lasted because ‘they’ weren’t there.  And in the case of what is termed ‘highway-hypnosis’, they may have no memory whatsoever of where they were, or of what transpired, during that ‘lost period of time.’

Acclaimed author on the subject of nonduality, Joan Tollifson, coined a phrase in her most recent book, “Nothing To Grasp”, which I just love.  I believe it is about the most clear and helpful term that I’ve heard to describe the actual movement into the realm of enlightened awareness, and that term is “falling awake”.  [Although it is not truly a movement at all, but rather just a gentle falling or dropping away of the thought-created conceptual overlay we identify as ‘our world’, which has been believed into ‘being’ by its creator and imaginary center– me.]  What remains is “JUST THIS”, this inscrutable, intangible, vibrant, flowing, ever-morphing kalidescope of experience appearing magically in the eternal, timeless present NOW moment.  And it appears only in and as awareness, the ‘light of consciousness’, which is always nowhere and yet everywhere, and ever-present.  It is ultimately ‘what we are’, if it is helpful to express it in that way, or as ‘your original face’, as some ancient Zen Buddhist master’s have put it.  It is exactly that which is breathing, thinking, living, and reading these words right here, right now.  But this is a state which can neither be reached nor attained, for it is that place, NOW/HERE, which can never be lost and never be left.  Indeed, there is nothing and no-one who could ever enter THIS, or leave THIS!

Now, what most spiritual seekers end up doing at some point, is imagining that there is a perfect self-less state where they ought to be ALL the time, and an ordinary, everyday self-full state (i.e. ‘me’) where they are MOST of the time.  In the first place, there is no-one in that self-less state they pine for, and truly, there is no-one in that self-full state either!  But by believing themselves to be individuals, separate and independent of everyone and everything, they have (in their minds) fallen from grace, from ‘Eden’, and lost their souls and their true home, destined to wander endlessly through a wilderness of separation and suffering.  Realizing that they (‘you’) have never left that ‘true home’ and could never do so is the ‘pathless path’, the ‘gateless gate’, and the shortest distance ‘home’ (i.e. Liberation).  You just need to ‘fall awake’ to the fact that You (‘the BIG YOU’ – pure awareness itself) is expressing infinite possibilities ALL the time, and that one of those possibilities appearing NOW/HERE is an apparently separate human body-mind endorsing a belief that I am a unique ‘ME’ in ‘THIS WORLD’!  …and THAT’S OK!  That is just one more way in which that BIG YOU (i.e. never absent pure awareness) is showing up NOW/HERE!  Sure, sometimes living this ‘life as me’ is not the most pleasant or joyful experience; sometimes it is, but sometimes it’s just plain hell.  But like the weather where I live, you can just wait a little while and it will change.  This opportunity to experience the full range of possibilities available in the life of a so-called human being was just the price of admission to this endlessly engaging Masquerade Ball that YOU (the BIG YOU- awareness itself) chose to pay to play.

Realize that you, and I mean the really, really big YOU, have chosen to ‘be here/now’, whatever that might mean to ‘you-personally’.  But there is a huge consolation to be had for the apparently-separate individual, in awakening to the appreciation of his/her ‘true, eternal, invulnerable and joyful True Self’.  And from that place (the ONLY place), and forever and always THIS PLACE, I see …no problem.

by Les Collins

It is my desire to share with you this Christmas season a deeply felt message of Love and Hope and Joy.

Life as we experience it has a way of throwing surprises and disappointments in our path, which frequently try our faith, challenge our beliefs, and threaten our peace and happiness.  In my own life, the shock and surprise of the recent loss of my beloved son Jon, in the prime of his life, was without a doubt the most difficult and challenging psychological and emotional shock I have ever endured.  It has, however, returned me to the awareness that ultimately there really are no endings, but only new beginnings.

Were it not for the generally held belief of the Christian world in the bodily resurrection of Jesus, it is doubtful that there ever would have been a Christ, or a Christmas.   So for me, the Spirit of Christmas can be summed up in one word, resurrection.  But not the physical resurrection of one man, but the true resurrection as Spirit, for which the resurrection of Jesus is but a metaphor.  It calls us into remembrance.  Remembrance of the one true spirit which animates and experiences every facet and every experience which each of us, and all of us, have ever known.  It is not the life identified by our name and social security number, or temporally extending from one calendar date to some future one.  Or restricted to the dimensions of this one limited human body.  It is the calm, still, loving and joyful spirit of eternal aware presence which has never left us for a moment, nor is capable of ever doing so.  It is always who and what we are at center.

It is what makes our world possible, what makes our joys, interests, friends, family, life, and all our delights, loves, and all our large and small satisfactions possible.  It is breathing us now, pumping our blood, and regulating effortlessly the billions of known and unknown bodily processes without which there would be no joy, no loves, no life.

It is this awareness that calls to us now; that calls to us endlessly.   It is this awareness which we are.   It is too close to us to be seen.  It is too close to us to be described.  Truly, it is us.  But we can only know it by its effects.  We know it as the joy we feel in the face of an infant.   We know it as the love we feel for our family members, our friends and life partners.  We know it as the compassion we feel for those who undergo difficult conditions and tragic circumstances.  We know it as the joy and bliss we feel in the warm company of those dearest to us, including our beloved pets.  We know it in the transporting bliss and ecstasy of complete immersion in an experience we love– music, painting, books, sports, the arts, the movies– whatever it is that lifts us up!

To you, my friends, and to you, my friends whom I haven’t met yet, I send you the deepest joy and peace of which I am capable, to express my deepest gratitude for your presence in my life, in our life!  In the light in your eyes, I see my joy reflected.  In the smile on your face I see my own joy revealed.   I thank you all for being my true spiritual presents, both now and always.  My life would have no meaning without the divine grace of your presence in it.  It is my fondest wish that this Christmas season and always, not one thing ever escapes your recognition that it is, in essence, a gift to you, deserving your deepest thanks, and your warmest embrace!

Blessings to you, both now and always, and Thank You!

Les Collins

It is quite often difficult to write a new blog entry for this website.  It is known that nothing which can be stated in words can be said to be True in any absolute sense, since all words and concepts are flawed dualistic tools and hand-servants of the mind only.  Normally, there are no words which, in the hearing of them, do not become instant conceptual fodder for the mind to employ in its ceaseless activity of creating, defending and controlling its self-generated personal legend and heroic journey through time, space and reality.  After all, These Are the Voyages of the Starship Self-Enterprise.

One of the most powerful metaphorical stories in the Bible is for me the tale of the prodigal son.   Its innate power derives from its perfect depiction of the human condition, and the light it shines on the nature of its misery and the secret to its salvation.

Because we are blind to the effortless magnificence of our natural state as God itself burst into ecstatic expression, we twist ourselves into powerless contorted caricatures of our divine and perfect spotless nature.   From this dark and fear-driven outcast and desperate state we grasp for sips and crumbs from the table of life from which we have been banished by our own limited and misbegotten self-conceptions.    We who are Kings of the very kingdom we evoke and sustain by our timeless aware-presence, search endlessly for secrets and clues and hints of progress in a world which is the very offspring of our very own being itself.    We spend endless hours and herculean efforts at gleaning clues and tidbits of the ancient wisdom of the masters to climb one more step up the infinite stairway to Heaven, never seeing that the Mind of Christ, the Wisdom of the Buddha, and the ultimate Krishna Consciousness is that which has always been looking from behind our eyes; and never has any ‘other’ ever looked.    All the yearnings and all the efforts of the entire history of human spiritual and religious discipline and practice has been only to gain insight into, pay homage to, and feel closer to the omniscient and timeless Holy Spirit (aware-presence) which views and sustains all from your eyes now!  You indeed are that ultimate mystery of life and existence which you have always been seeking!  Though we shall never objectively or conceptually understand that mystery which we (“I”) am, we can rest in the timeless awareness that we absolutely are that mystery,  independent of time, space, and fantasies of mortal limitation.

It is never possible for me to gaze into anyone’s eyes without silently saying to myself, “Oh, come off it now!  You’re not fooling me!  I know who you are, by God, and frankly I’m really starting to lose my patience with this silly game of yours!  Enough already!” Please stop pretending you have something you really must do, one more amazing theory you absolutely need to investigate, one more robed holyness you must visit to make one more crucial step in this egoic game of advancement.   Come home to where you belong.  Your Father has a robe for you, and the food is outstanding!

“It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found.”       Luke 15:32 KJV

by Les Collins

A solid case can be made that the fundamental core motivation underlying virtually all human behavior, personally, socially and culturally, is fear.   And the most basic fear, lying at the heart of all their many forms and varieties, is the fear of death.   Let us now ask:  What is the source of this nearly universal fear of death?

Obviously, the thought of personal death can only arise in the mind of a body/mind organism that has learned that all physical bodies are mortal, and that his body is no exception.   But the fear of death can only appear if the body/mind in question has first believed the thought that he is the body, or that his life is absolutely dependent on that body for its existence.  The fact is that it is not death per se which is feared, but the apparent end of “one’s consciousness” itself;  which signifies, to “our self,” the end of our life, our identity, our story, and our world.

Non-duality tries to bring us to an experiential living appreciation of the essential “empty nature” of physical reality which modern nuclear physics and quantum theory have already discovered and demonstrated.   The “substance” of the world is not matter, but a complex dance of subtile energy patterns in a field of awareness.  All we can ever know of “the world” is based entirely upon sensations, which are only experiences in conscious awareness itself.  Consequently, all our perceptions and “experiences” of an “outside world” consist only of inferences, projections, and beliefs within consciousness itself.  How then does this dream or illusion become the real, solid and tangible world of our experience?  The trick is accomplished when the psychic belief system (of thoughts) of a body/mind organism inhabits the belief and sense of its self as a separate, discrete and autonomous entity.  As such, all that appears “outside” its arbitrary borders and boundaries now becomes the “external” world.  From the point of view of an imagined separate entity, the experience of its complement, an imagined separate world, could not seem other than absolutely solid and real.  This co-appearance (by imagination, in consciousness) is called, in Buddhist teachings, an instance of “mutual arising.”

This leaves us in the unenviable predicament of having the full-on living experience of being a vulnerable, pathetic and tragic human figure engaged in its long and painful slog to an almost certain pitiful end.  The Buddha called this condition suffering.  What is always possible, however, is finding a crack in the cosmic egg – a psychological quantum leap into a radically new life of utter fearlessness, unconditional love, freedom, spontaneity, gratitude, and absolute peace.

Fortunately, it is possible, though not always easy, to follow the advice of legions of mystics and sages throughout history, to learn to “die before you die.”  This means to surrender your attachment to and your identification as the limited mortal body/mind, which is clearly the most blatant and insidious case of “identity theft” which has ever been perpetrated.   It is necessary to awake to the realization that the conscious awareness you mistook to be a characteristic of your “body/mind self” is, in fact, your only true identity and timeless essence.  It is only that in which the appearance and the experiencing of the body, mind and world could ever have seemed to take place.  And it is only that spaceless and timeless aware presence that has ever truly existed.   Its eternal nature is intangible being, conscious presence, and immutable peace. [In sanskrit: sat, chit, ananda.]  It is that which preceded your “birth” and survives your “death.”  And it is only that which has seen every sight, tasted every taste, had every experience, and felt all the love you have ever known.  It is God.  It is Life.  It is Heaven.  It is now and it is here.  And, of course, it is only that which is reading this.

Namaste,

Les Collins

A question I often hear in our weekly group boils down to this: “What’s in it for Me?”    Nondual teachings can sound very interesting and intriguing from a metaphysical point of view, but in the end people want to know what tangible benefits can be gained from the struggle to penetrate to a deeper understanding of what can seem a very difficult and often perplexing teaching.

The answer to that question resides deep in the core of our own personal identity.   Some ancient eastern yogic traditions point to various etheric ‘inner bodies’ existing at more subtle ‘inner levels’ which are said to be no less real than our physical bodies.   In fact, it is claimed that they are more real and long-lasting than our flesh and blood varieties, and can be accessed and experienced through particular techniques and practices.   Whether or not we choose to believe in the existence of these ‘inner dimensions,’ there are practical insights to be gained from even a metaphorical interpretation.    It is taught that from the absolute perspective none of these bodies or ‘levels of consciousness’ is real in and of themselves.   Plus, as one progresses through the various levels it becomes obvious (self-evident) that the previous level(s) were merely dream states as seen from the awakened perspective of the current ‘higher level’!   This explains a great deal about the ‘nature of reality’ itself:  Reality is relative.   Each ‘dream level’ is experienced as absolutely real because at every level we experience ourselves to be absolutely real, and the world that we experience from our current state is always a perfect reflection of our self-concept in all respects!  And of course this also applies to the personal experience of our own life as we continue to progress on our own spiritual path and inner growth.

Our self-concept, our very identity, is constructed and conditioned at each and every level by our unique history of perceptions, experiences, relationships, interpretations, and personal narrative.   This self-construct is generally an extremely vulnerable, mortal and self-limiting belief system fraught with fears, anxieties, neuroses, helplessness, guilt, remorse, unhappiness, pain and suffering.   Do we see any problem here?   Well, the good news is that as we begin to ‘make progress on the spiritual path,’ as it is called, we undergo a gradual and nearly imperceptible evolution of our self-concept.   We cease to be the old, miserable and self-limiting wretches we once were, and find ourselves now ‘traveling lighter.’    And the innate joy, love, happiness and freedom which has always characterized our inner ‘true Self’ gradually but inevitably becomes more and more the face that we present to the world, resulting in a greatly enriched and more profoundly satisfying life experience.    This transformation can occur rapidly, or it may seem to drag on endlessly, but the rewards which await the patient and persistent spiritual seeker more than justify the journey, which, in the end, will appear to have happened in just the blink of an eye to “A Whole New You!”

by Les Collins

Advaita-speak, particularly from its Eastern roots, is full of references to the World being an illusion, or a dream.  Naturally this does not seem to make a great deal of sense to Western ears and minds, being themselves products of a very solid materialistic cultural worldview.  Let’s see if we can unravel this a little bit and arrive at a deeper insight into exactly what’s being pointed to here.

In the first place, if we take a very close look at our immediate direct experience (seeing, hearing, touching, smelling and tasting) we understand that at the very root, all we know of  ‘the world’ is derived, or ‘constructed’ from, those sensations- in mind (or in consciousness).  Remove those five senses, as in deep, dreamless sleep, or in a state of unconsciousness, and for all practical purposes the world ceases to be!  Of course whenever we ‘return’ from that ‘detached’ state, the world (as we conceive it to be), pops right back into place, more or less just as it was before we ‘left’ it.

Let’s look now at what really constitutes this ‘world of our experience.’  As we saw above, ultimately (absolutely) all that we really have to work with is a bundle of sensations, upon which is running our old standard ‘OS’ (operating system), built upon the root belief that ‘we’ (or ‘I’) is a separate autonomous entity encountering and interfacing with an exterior ‘outside world’- the ‘not me’.   That OS software is our ‘GUI,’ a graphical user interface, much like ‘Windows’ on your computer.  It automatically assigns an icon (form) and a label (name) to everything that pops up on your ‘screen,’ or in your ‘field of awareness’ in our case.  And, “Wallah!”  Now we have created an apparent world of objects and people in space and time which we can now apparently manipulate and interact with to our heart’s content!  Naturally this is an incredibly useful and powerful situation to be in (just ask Bill Gates), as it enables us to fully embody the sense of being a ‘real person’ who is having a ‘real life,’ interacting and functioning in a ‘real world!’  Who ever said you were not a Great Magician!  And in spite of perhaps a few little glitches and drawbacks, ultimately what could really be better than this!!

The fundamental problem with continuing ‘to run our lives’ and operate 24/7 with this dependable OS operating system in place is that we wind up believing it!   In the end what we are, all we are, is that state of pure, aware presence from which and in which, all sensations, perceptions and thoughts (including the thought ‘the world’) appear and disappear!  This that we are is a constant, unending and timeless presence.  It is that which ‘we‘ have never left, and cannot truly ever leave.  There are no problems, nor illness, nor death, nor lack, nor needs, nor pain nor suffering there (i.e. here)!  And the most wonderful thing is that it cannot be your destination or goal, since ‘you’ cannot get there, or achieve it, or find it!  There is no spiritual journey, nor practice, nor mantra, nor secret formula, nor act of grace, that can bring you to that which you have always been!  You are, in fact, in Heaven, as Jesus thoughtfully pointed out to us in “The Gospel of Thomas,” and you just cannot ever leave!

But you really are the Great Magician.  You know that now.  So if it happens to be your sincere wish to continue pretending that you are a tiny, mortal, pathetic little creature dragging its sorry ass ever onward to death and destruction, with no hope of salvation, Go For It!

by Les Collins

Recently, I heard an amazing Zen story for the first time.  I think it was related by author and teacher Rupert Spira.  The story goes:  There was a Zen monk living in a monastery who had read in the Bible that faith can move mountains.  He was very excited to hear this and went to the Abbot to ask if this was really true.   The Abbot replied, “Of course!” So the earnest monk asked if he could learn how to do it.  He was led by the Abbott to a spot on the grounds which offered a perfect view of a distant mountain range.  He told the monk to meditate at this spot for as long as necessary, focusing solely on the task of moving mountains.  As the weeks and months turned into years, the monk persisted in his efforts.

Eventually, after about three years had past, the Abbot decided to check in on his monk’s progress.  “You’ve been sitting here for about three years now, but the mountains do not appear to have moved a bit.  What seems to be the problem, if I may ask?”  “Well,” said the monk, “eventually I found that I was indeed able to move the mountains, but I also realized something far more incredible.”  “And what would that be?”, asked the Abbot. The monk explained, “I came to realize that I was the one who originally placed each of those mountains exactly where they are, and that that is exactly where they are supposed to be!  I would not move even one of them by so much as an inch.”

The events which compose the fabric of our lives can seem joyous or painful, wonderful or dreadful, ecstatic or horrific at the time they occur.  But often the most difficult and challenging to endure, seem on reflection to be the most significant and transformative and essential experiences we have ever known.  Nevertheless, so many people never cease striving for this, that or the other outcome, accomplishment, acquisition or relationship which will finally make their lives transformed, complete and perfect.  The Zen story above reflects the deepest truth that anything and everything in our lives and in the universe cannot, and is not, less than absolutely perfect, and exactly as it must be.  [Of course, our actions and responses to conditions that require remedies or corrections are also exactly as they must be, also.]   But in the end the final solution to a life filled with pain, fear, resistance, struggle and suffering, which is the experience of so many, lies in just a simple willingness to embrace whatever situation is confronting us in this moment, and love what is.

by Les Collins